Week in Weird – 3/19

The Devil Monkey

We’ve all heard stories of Bigfoot in North America, and of course there are monkeys in South America, but what if there is another primate loose in the Americas? Dubbed the Devil Monkey, this creature seems to roam North America in an area consisting of the southern states from just west of Appalachia all the way to Arizona across the plains. It is reported to be very aggressive, and highly intelligent, but does not match the description of any known primates.
Dad’s Thoughts:
Well now here’s a story you don’t hear often. I think I have some vague recollection of whisperings by some of the old timers when I was very young about monkeys in the woods. When I heard the description of this thing, though, the first thing I thought of was a sloth. It’s the three toed thing that throws me. First, if I’m getting attacked by a wild animal I’m not counting his toes. Second, if this thing is as fast as people say good luck counting the toes.
All that being said it would not be hard for a primate to hide in the wilds of the south. There’s a lot of acreage throughout the Mid-West that is very sparsely populated. While I don’t think that this is some kind of demented monkey out for blood, it is entirely possible that there is an unknown primate living somewhere in North America. Primates are extremely territorial creatures, which would explain the attacks and some species definitely hunt smaller animals. I’ve personally never seen a monkey in the south, and I don’t know anyone who even knows anyone that has.
It’s possible, but I’d venture the guess that people have seen escaped pets or these are cases of mis-identification (like the picture of the dog that’s supposed to be a devil monkey – calling BS on that one right now).

Next: If you are what you eat, this guy had too much pork.


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